A Kinky Girls Decent

Rape, It's hilarious.

2012-01-20T16:07:00.000-08:00

At the beginning of the fall television season Inoticed that rape jokes seemed to be flowing in abundance. From side swipeson House to overtly offense antics on Two and Half Men, It was apparent to me that writers were a.) becoming lesscreative by the millisecond or b.) Prime time television works on afashion-esque forecasting system.

I have been meaning to write a post about myobservations but instead, I wrote them off as just another boutof hypersensitivity and trailed along through another long semester, tocome home and force out laughter over jokes I don’t actually think were funny.But to my surprise I'm not the only person whose picked up onthis heinous trend. Jezebel Publishedan article this week bringing attention to the issue; accompanied bya fantastic montage from the New York Times appropriately named"This Seasons Many Rape Jokes on TV." Enjoy.

Don't Ever Second Guess The Cardinal Rule

2011-10-24T16:16:00.000-07:00

I Just finished the first half of my western philosophy midterm and I got 18 out of 25, which sucks. And not just for the obvious reason. I have one rule that I always, always follow.

If you’re taking a multiple choice quiz and the last answer available is

“all of the above”- it probably is.

I DIDN”T HEED MY OWN ADVICE!

I could have easily gotten 25 out of 25, 22 out of 25 if I was feeling a little less lazy; simply by choosing All of above for the last 7 questions! How absurd is that? Did I do this?

NO!

I decided to be a smarty-pants and ignore the only advice I ever give myself that never fails me, sigh.

Girl

2011-06-27T14:05:00.000-07:00

Originally written January 8, 2011. This was an old post from my other blog I wanted to post here

I've been spending a lot more time with Bbbm, more then i expected. I've gone over to his house a few times. Most of the time when I'm there I pack a pair of pajama bottoms i can slack off in his couch in. we sit there in sweat-pants and worn T-shirts. watching our favorite episodes of Tv's show that aren't airing anymore. I throw my feet over his lap, claiming him like a conquered country while his primary partner is fiddling on her laptop in the next room. The other day we were sitting exactly like this, while editing pictures for a photography class I took this past semester. He knows far more about Cs5 then i do and i admit i made little effort in actually trying to learn anything about it. Instead of editing the photographs myself, I nuzzled my laptop between his arm and his ribcage; hoping he would get the gesture. He looked at me and smiled. I noticed how much I like to see his glasses perched on his nose; how dark the hairs of his beard appear in florescent light and length of his lashes from the angle we were twisted in.

You're such a girl. he quipped.

Me! Me? I'm a girl, right well, yes i am. technically, but that was the first time that i can think of anyone ever realizing that in fact, i am girl. When i was younger i was always taller then everyone else, broader and wider. i'm only the shorter person in a room full of men and even then i would have to be wearing sneakers in order for that to happen. I was never really one of the guys but the girls treated me like i could have been. i didn't like pink, i liked cars and captain planet. i liked skateboarding biology and karate. these weren't stereotypical girl activities and i grew up feeling extra-ordinary for things about my body and my mindset i couldn't really control.

I didn't want to ruin it.

I didn't want him to see how happy his playful banter had just made me. I wanted him to say it again, in a chorus from the roof tops of the highest brownstone. I wanted to hear it echo down Bleecker; busting glass windows and bone structure... i am a girl, a tall girl. a fat girl a black girl but a girl. I'm not perfect but i, i just am and i wanted it validated. it now it is.

A Quick Update!

2011-06-18T10:03:00.000-07:00

Right! So, I’ve decided to return to my original name and continue blogging as such. Which made all the sense in the world to me at the time and it still does but in the same breath I realize how this can be slightly confusing for those who read this blog, noticed I quit while I was a head and then suddenly resurfaced six months later. I would love to write some long entry about what in the hell happened but I’m super good at lists; and I mean who doesn’t love a list?

In the past Six months I've:

-Finally received my computer after this debacle.

-Returned to school and my Oakland apartment.

-Officially Stopped dating all together.

-Then I met someone

-Then proceeded to stop dating after my quick tryst.

-Met with a psychologist after this and was told I suffer from untreated PTSD and a colorful arrangement of other miserable life making things like this.

-Discovered the wonderful world of SSRIs

-Was quickly kicked out of the wonderful world of SSRIs because my insurance company has other plans for my mental health and overall well-being.

- Tried to continue school without my newfound SSri assistance

-Failed miserably

-Dropped out of my major

-Picked a new major

-Gained 15 pounds

-Took lots of pictures

- Laid depressed in my bed for 3 weeks

-Flew back to New York

-And here I am.

Oh, and in the midst of all of this I Stunted this blog and started a new, a new one I barely wrote in.

So that's the short version of the full story and over the next few months I'll be adding little bits of missing pieces here, I'm sure but in the mean time.

Enjoy your weekend!

Tell Somebody how you feel today

2011-06-04T07:16:00.000-07:00

I saw this video while searching sites for research today. How people interact is one of the most curious things. I Found this video to be painfully true, what do you think?
Could have been Love story
photo source

Can We...

2011-05-30T21:28:00.000-07:00

Just start over?

I tried once already. I turned my BDSM love child[ this blog] into a life-less archive; I moved, changed my blogger name and thought that would suddenly bring about change in my life. Turns out, that's not how change happens.

So can we pretend I didn’t leave and continue my unexpected life adventures here?

My Best Kept Secret

2011-01-14T02:26:00.000-08:00

I’m turning this blog into an archive.

I know! It's a little crazy and scary and unexpected. I've been thinking about it for a while and I felt that after much whining and griping that I, I’m just not this person anymore. I've hit the ground on this decent and I'm more interested in exploring the person I've become. My place as a submissive, learning to deal with trauma and understanding what it means to be queer an artist and a writer. I just don't feel like a kinky girl is a place for me to do that anymore.

Now with that beginning said. I'm not dropping off the face of the earth, heavens no! I'm just changing names and changing addresses. And you are all more then welcome to continue this journey with me.

I was feeling cramped in this kinky little box I created for myself, so I felt like busting out and changing venues.

Blogger, it's been real but I’ve set my sites on something new. Thank you everybody for being there for me when I was down and for all of your encouraging words. I can’t really express what it has meant to me really, thank you.

Now for something completely different...

A·jar

Would you rather be intelligent or beautiful? Why?

2011-01-08T07:34:00.001-08:00

That's a loaded question, at least for me. If you asked me when I was 14 if I wanted be beautiful vs. smart I would have gone for beautiful without hesitation. Now, I find something very beautiful in my intelligence. It’s the type of beauty that gets better with age. No plastic surgery required.

Great Question :)

Ask me anything

I am a firm believer in using the word "Cunt". Howdo you react internally to this word. Do you use it?

2011-01-08T07:28:00.001-08:00

Normally in a fit of giggles, I love the word, there is something Germanic about it. It projects from the back of the mouth, out of the user and into the face of the recipient. I find it to be a deviant & sexy word if you say it right.

Ask me anything

Pixar's Ultimate " It Get's Better" Video

2010-11-23T11:11:00.000-08:00

If you're not teary eyed by the end of this, there is something wrong with your insides.

Bleeding Hearts And Bleeding Breast: An Epic Halloween Experience

2010-11-05T10:13:00.000-07:00

My Halloween weekend started with a strap on 101 class at the pleasure chest. That only helped me realize how badly I want a spare parts harness and someone to use it on. I met epic at his place after running around collecting my costumes and tutu's and whatever else I felt I needed to get through the weekend. We bounced around from one party to the next. I had personal one on one time with him my first night out. We went to a party full of people I didn't know (which is rare, I can normally recognize a face or two). I wore a red tutu under the Lolita skirt I bought at comic-con this year, with striped stockings and high heels. I didn't look half bad if I do say so myself. And trooping around in six-inch high heels across the cracked and dismayed streets of Manhattan I think deserves a sticker or two. The building was guarded and there was this unusual security thing we had to go through just to get into the elevator. We wasted no time once we got there. He pulled out the weighted gloves and we did a little impact play. I was never one for punching but it's something new I'm experimenting with. My favorite moments before play are the seconds before, when we aren't friends. He isn't Himself nor am I. he is the Top and I’m the bottom. He gives blows and I take them. I can see that change, just seconds before those gloves hit my inner thighs, arms and waistline.

Hanging off the side of someone else leather couch I realized that rammstein was playing. His weighted gloves were cold against my skin making his way up my torso and chest. With a quick slapped to the face I am dazed. We went on like this back and forth throwing punches and sucking face for at least an hour or two. I played with our fellow Dom Friend who has this air of sexy Dom-ness I like to observe and not necessarily interact with. I had my first single tail experience which was better then anything I expected. I have this cartoonish idea of what being whipped felt like. You see this 4-5 foot long serpent like instrument, normally used to horde Cattle and beat the unwilling in to submission. And in the kinky world it’s known primarily for hurting like a bitch and breaking skin. If you asked me I was rightfully scared but if you've got the right dominate behind the whip you should be fine? And I was, surprisingly. I enjoyed it or as sexy Dom friend put it " I fucked all your shit up!"

We left the party and Overdosed on bacon at some diner on Lexington. I sat parallel to Sexy Dom’s submissive and we laughed about things that didn't make any sense. We were both intoxicated from play and when you're flying in subspace everything that seems remotely interesting is the funniest thing you'll ever hear.

The next day we went to paddles [NYC's oldest dungeon] I wore my snow white out fit (hair ribbon included, but I lost it.) I pranced around collecting free collars and watching my friends get spankings from their Dominate partners. I sat there in my dress watching all the kinky couples and floaters interact with each other. When I have too much time to myself my mind wonders off and I’m caught thinking about all the things I spend so much time running from.

I wish I had a Dominate to touch me like that

I wish I didn't have to ask to be kissed

I wish I didn't hate Misant so much right now I’d call him

I wish I bought flats with me

I shot up out of my chair and walked off for the millionth time, surveying my surroundings when I ran into this tiny little man. He had a beard and hat on. He hit on me, bought me a bottle of water and asks if I wanted to go to Vegas. I politely declined but we struck up a conversation anyway. He was weird and friendly. I took his number and I’m undecided if I actually want to call him. I attract the strangest strangers.

Epic myself and his submissive [The Midge] spent the rest of the week sexing each other up and streaming videos on his ruko box. I was having such a good time I didn't think anything could possible go wrong.

And then it did...

First I should start off my introducing this new character. We'll call H.I Lovecraft. Why? Well, he's in to all things scary and spooky, with a dire love for death metal and gothic makeup. Sense we've gotten to know each other he delights me and frightens me. Much like a H.P novel don't you think? He's my mentor and currently my protector and maybe something more one day but that's neither here nor there. I went out to our last play party of the week, dressed in the snow white outfit I vowed to get tons of mileage in. earlier that day I messaged H.I to tell him I ran into a little trouble at a play party I attended [a post all of it's own, I promise]. He responded with a flat answer that sent me tail spinning. I didn't know what I expected. He doesn't seem like the ballistic type. I didn't think he would be filled with fury or he would cry about it. But the flat nonchalant response I did get, didn't really make any sense to me. I tried to leave it alone but me being exactly who I am I couldn't. In response to me inquiring if there was a problem I got this message:

I will call you and talk to you when I am ready to, but thank you for your permission. If something is or was wrong I would have told you. So I just said “ me and you are gonna have to have a talk [insert my name here]’

That’s it

It could be about anything so no need in over thinking it or trying to think for me. So I will speak to you when I speak to you.

Little does H.I Lovecraft know, I am the reigning Champaign of over thinking and I was thinking hard! What could I have done wrong in a little less then 24 hours to piss him off? I proceeded to Pout with vigor. I pouted all the way to the two train, I pouted on the two train and I pouted all the way to the party. I collected myself in the bathroom. I tried to get over it but there was just something in the back of my mind eating away at all the potential things that could be going on. All the things he might have been thinking and not telling me. I didn't want to place this burden on my friends so I strapped on a smile and went about my marry way... well, at least for a little while. We all stepped out for a smoke, I wasn't the only one with problems that night and after attending three parties in three days we were all pretty tired. I couldn't help but dwell on the problem I was trying and failing at concealing and the midge noticed. After that I fell apart, I couldn't stop crying no matter how badly I tried. On one hand I felt terrible, not only was I now putting my relationship problems on the last two people I would ever want to do that to but now I’m that nameless girl in the slutty costume crying too close to the curb at 12 am. And in any city; that site is all too familiar. I sat there covering my eyes, hoping it was too dark to see the tears streaming down my face. I thought to myself ' At least I’m not drunk'.

And there it is, the second hand. The upside to all of this ...

We paid the 30-dollar fee, for the private party we spent very little time at. We packed our things and went home but god did we make the most of it. We carried on the theme of the weekend, which was sex and beacon. We order sandwiches (I order chicken parm with beacon) followed by a bag of onion rings and a box of mini black and white cookies and we ate ourselves stupid. It was the first time I had ever seen the south parks imagination Trilogy. We all sat on the futon together Pj's on. The midge and me screamed every time the cartoon terrorist killed a care bear and Epic laughed while we screamed because he's a sadistic bastard like that. I fell a sleep soundly, thinking about how amazing my friends are and I didn't bother to think once about what H.I Lovecraft was up to.

The next day was the parade, and in New York the Halloween parade like St. patties and thanksgiving it’s another great excuse to take off work if you can. I was exhausted and water logged from the night before and I didn't want to go. Again Epic and the midge sacrificed a night out for staying in with me. They invited over a friend for some friendly play on Halloween day.

[Said friend I’ll being referring to as BBBM Big. Burly. Black Man]

BBBM and I have a little bit of history. Our history consist of me popping up every once and a while at local events and meetings and him not noticing me for any reason what so ever, even though he is friends with both epic and the midge. Where they go I’m not far behind so it wasn't like we never met. It didn't bother me when I noticed him but he didn't notice me. Okay that's a lie; it annoyed me that I’ve had to reintroduce myself every time we've met. I knew who he was every time but he had no idea I existed. Until recently that is. We hit it off at comic-con this year; at first I didn't want anything to do with him after remembering he had a white submissives preference (at least one of those attributes I am lacking) and a girlfriend to boot. But getting to know him more and finding out his relationship was "open". I stopped worrying about the past and focused on getting laid for the fifth connective day. BBBM excites me, not him so much as his body. He is such a big guy and that physique (pot belly or not) for me; it's a panty dropper. I like a man I feel that I can scale if I wanted to. Up his back and down his chest if he let me. If I feel at any point in time that I can take you in a fight, I’m probably not going to want to sleep with you. The logic is silly I know but it's always been that way; at least for me. His presence is big, his voice is bigger and I’ve been toying with the idea of having him inside of me. It helps that we have a mess of things in common and I like sitting next to him, lying in his lap and playing with is fingers. He makes me feel little. Not in the sense that I’m insecure in his presence but the exact opposite. I'm wide-eyed and wonderest.

BBBM is good with rope; good is a smidge of an understatement actually. I’m not much of a rope slut but I enjoy watching a Top work. He tied my breast up in cupcakes (which seems to be a favorite among those who do play with me, I don't know why that is) and my wrist, pressed together firmly behind my back, he tied those too. I sat there for a while all tided up watching South Park the imagination trilogy for the third night in a row. This time there was a caught:

If you scream when they kill the care bears I’m going to punch you.

I didn't know what to think? Punch me ...they're care bears for Christ sakes, the epitome of my childhood and the south park writers where killing them off one fluffy rainbow at a time! I tired to control the urge to scream. I never played with BBBM before and sense there was no talk of limits, protocol or safe words and with what little I do know about him, he is apparently sadistic with a capital S so I didn't bother trying to fathom where exactly he was going to punch me. But sure enough I screamed and my already bruised boobies caught one right in the center and another one in the arm.

There were two care bears...

I had already taken the risk early in the week playing with someone I didn't know. I was scared to play with BBBM but once we got started I tried to settle in to a grove with him. He tossed me down and worked the undersides of my breast with a metal skewer. Looking up at him, I watched as he methodically created bruises I couldn't see. And the added commentary didn't help at all.

The left isn't bruising as fast as the right.

Oh! This one is purple that's nice; you've got nice colors on this one.

I had taken my fair share of beatings over the past 5 days but the one handed down by BBBM was the most intense. Between the biting and the punching the skewer poking and the caning. Having my breast tided together, thrown around with duct tape around my mouth. Having my ass and legs set on fire while having to sit through the barely audible sound of care bears dying in the background; I was bound to reach my breaking point. I must have yelped Poughkeepsie a dozen times in 10 minutes.

BBBM looked at me cockeyed; Poughkeepsie? Yes, my safe-word is Poughkeepsie and there is no way you could possibly mistake Poughkeepsie as something sexy. It's weird and it's always out of context. I didn't have to tell him it was a safe-word he was so bewildered by it he stopped immediately. With in a few minutes we were at it again. I thought I could withstand another round or two but he mounted me to my surprise, slapping my chest from left to right, and I broke; choking on my own tears I could barely get a Poughkeepsie out. He assured me that I was okay and what I was feeling was a rush of adrenaline. I was gasping and hyperventilating and one does not compliment the other. He couched me I started breathing in threw my nose and out of mouth. I looked up at him being the sadistic fuck he is I caught him smiling.

I must have looked like a nervous wreck to everyone in the room but while me and BBBM had our play the midge and Epic had theirs. I was jealous, sense Epic is pretty generous and lets the midge come, but I wasn't so lucky. I wanted the wand to play with. It was late and I needed to sleep, but after such an intense first play session with BBBM I wanted it more then anything else. But unfortunately for me when epic and BBBM are in the same room, the song anything you can do I can do better comes to mind. I knew I wasn't going to come anytime soon but I held out hope. Now that the midge was asleep and I was the last standing submissive in the room I was double-teamed.

Neither one of them wanted me to have the wand! They played and toyed with my feeling. Shouting banter at one another when an ultimatum made it's way into the conversation.

If you were willing to give me an enthusiastic blowjob, I might let you come.

Now this doesn't sound like a hard thing to do but again being that I am who I am I had to over think it. What if he doesn't like it? I thought, and then I’m fucked. I debated with BBBM, I told him I didn't know if my skills were up to par; sense I honestly haven't done an enthusiastic anything sense 2008. So who knows what my skills were like now? We went on like this for a while but I thought about the worst out come which would have been me sneaking off while everyone one was a sleep and wanking off in the bathroom. So I got down and unbuttoned his slacks. I was scared but I just put it into the back of my mind. I wasn't sure if it would be all right. BBBM is very quite so I had little to no cues on what he liked and what he didn't like. It felt good to have him in my mouth. He felt different from the others before him and I enjoyed the sensation of a brand new experience. When I came up he patted me on the head and told me I did good which felt even better then knowing I was about to get what I wanted. But is it ever that simple? No! BBBM grabbed me by the leg and slid me over back to him because I started to crawl away. He picked up the wand and I was so excited I thought I was going to have an embolism. He kept turning it on and off on and off pushing it deeper and deeper into my pelvis I was so close to what felt like a thousand cock blocks but he succumbed to my begging and pleading, and I haven't begged for anything sense my days with Tim. He placed his hand over my mouth to muffle the sounds I made but I could have woken up a small country. I curdled up under him for a while. He generates heat like he's plugged into the wall, because I’m anemic being a human heater is a prized quality in a lover for me. I told him I had homework to-do before sleeping, though I was good a ready to hit the pillow at this point.

Playing into the little in me before leaving he told me I had better get my homework done or something to that effect. We've been texting a little here and there, and I’m planning on making a few play partners this winter. So far I’ve met some great people and I’ve actually left my house to do other things besides sleep, slack and occasionally homework. I still haven't heard from H.I Lovecraft. It’s been six days today and I’m still really confused as to what the issue is, if there is one at all. I’m trying not to think about it so much. So far I’m failing terribly but I hope he contacts me soon so I can relax. I had a fantastic time this weekend minus the few bumps along the way. I can only hope it's this good next year.

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!

Pleasurists #102

2010-11-04T18:34:00.000-07:00

Beauty at Fall Creek by DimHorizonStudio
Welcome to Pleasurists, a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days. For updates and information follow our RSS Feed and Twitter.
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e[lust] #21
Editor

Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
On to the reviews…
Vibrators

Dildos

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Toys for Cocks

Lube, Massage Oil, Bath Stuff, & etc.

BDSM/Fetish

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An Open Invitation: A Real Swingers’ Party in San Francisco by Dr. Ruthie

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Miscellaneous

Relapse

2010-10-15T11:13:00.000-07:00

I fucked up last night.

I experienced a feeling of weakness; I couldn't fend off on my own.

I called my friends, but no one picked up the phone.

So I hunted and I scavenged for something to cut with. I found a box of pink shaving razors I haven't touched in god knows how long. It’s been that long sense I bothered to shave my own legs. It took me 20 mins and a pair of dull scissors to crack the top off of one. Glory is to heaven; these blades were brand new. I sat down in the middle of my bed and turned the main lights off and my tiny lamp on. I laid out my set up, the way I used to in 9th grade.

Cotton balls
Alcohol
Baby wipes
Gauze/ band-aids
Scotch tape
Razors
Music

My OCD tendencies blossom when I’m under stress, so I felt the need to lay everything out evenly according to size and color. I don't remember starting, I didn't think about the pain, what it feels like to draw a found foreign object across my skin. I just do it, no thoughts just actions and within seconds I’ve found a calm. A certain kind of quite I don't often experience ( the burden of being analytical).

I wrote this two weeks ago, I wish I remembered what set me off but I don't. I remember it was a hard week; bills are flying in one debt collector at a time. I received my first F for the semester and I blew off H.I Lovecraft (will explain) for the fourth time sense getting to know him. I look back now and I can see what I did was stupid but I don't feel bad for cutting myself. Sometimes you have to hit the bottom to see how far you've fallen. I’m writing this entry on lexapro. My head is fuzzy sense it's the first day I’ve started my medication after weeks of back and forth with my insurance company and my psychiatrist who did his very best explaining why I needed a brand name drug instead of some off brand placebo shit.

I'm interested to see how this goes. So far not so bad but I’ll keep you guys updated.

My First Review Ya'll! The screaming super powered bullet.

2010-10-15T10:35:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago I was approached by TheirToys .com to write a review for the screaming super powered bullet. I’m actually quite partial to bullets and when I found out they were sending one in hot pink, how could I say no? The screaming super powered bullet is mini no larger then an inch and a half in length. It has a smooth dome like shape on top as well as a waterproof ring around the center, protecting the battery on the inside.

It’s made of plastic and Hypo allergenic. At the base there is this convenient little button that switches speeds from off, light buzzing and high powered. There is supposed to be a middle ground between the high and low but I honestly only felt two speeds. The lowest speed I didn't like, I’m not fond of softer vibrations especially if it tickles. I like to really feel the sensations so the first setting wasn't for me. The second setting however I thought was fantastic. It was a nice sturdy vibration; there was no jerking or stopping and the battery life really held out. Speaking of batteries, the battery is replaceable and there is a battery included (one double A battery). After running the bullet under water for about three minutes, it holds up to it's waterproof promises.

I found this bullet is great for clitoral stimulation. Though I did have trouble finding the right position to hold it in. it is quite small and because of that I had problems with gripping the toy while using it and I also had a problem locating it after use. Yes, thiertoys sent me a free gift and I lost it! I wanted to take a few of my own pictures but instead I ended up with only 2 pictures of the easy to open plastic wrapper it came in.

It’s a good solo masturbation toy and I can definitely see this as a four-play starter. It’s easy to use for those who are beginning their sexual endeavors, though I would suggest placing this toy somewhere you'll be able to find it again. And it's quiet, quieter then any bullet I’ve ever used. So if you're looking for stimulation on the go, this bullet has got you covered. As far as cleaning it was pretty easy to wipe down after use and toys that have a ring in the middle aren't always the easiest to clean. I would suggest cleaning both the out side and around the stopper especially if you plan on using this toy on some else.

TheirToy's.com is selling The screaming super powered bullet for a decent price and if you don't think the screaming bullet is for you, try one of the many other bullet vibrators TheirToy's.com has to offer. Their packaging is discrete and they ship their products fast.

Pleasurists #98

2010-10-06T22:55:00.001-07:00

Pleasurists #98

Reach Out by Vampirainbow
Welcome to Pleasurists, a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviewsthat came out in the last seven days. For updates and information follow ourRSS Feed and Twitter.
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Looking for sexy posts other than reviews?

e[lust] #20
Editor’s Pick

Product Review: BonBon by Liberator by Rayne

I love this thing. Love it. The first time I used the BonBon was an amazing experience. It’s almost the perfect height, and holds most toys at exactly the right angle (except Tantus’s Curve, apparently… I couldn’t get comfortable when I attempted to ride the Curve.). And it took a serious amount of self control to hold off an orgasm completely unaided by fingers or vibration. This is huge for me, and I think it’ll help me to figure out a position in which I can orgasm during sex with M.

Note: A long but easy to read review that made me want to try BonBon. I especially love the first image of the matching Vixen Randy stuck into the BonBon. Simply gorgeous!

Editor

Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
On to the reviews…
Vibrators

The Eroscillator by Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
Pirates Pendant by Lucid Obsession
Mini Wanachi by Red Vinyl Kitty
LELO Nea by Mistress Kay
Power Bullet Breeze by Lucid Obsession
Sassy Swirl Squiggle by Mistress Kay
LELO Siri by Rayne
Liberte 1 by Jessie Beth
LELO Mona by Mistress Kay
Blue Venus by Beauty
We-Vibe II by Mystress Lady Evyl
Sqweel by Elodie
Toyfriends by Epiphora
Hummingbird by LiquidFyre
C-Spot by Beauty
Clit Tingler Climax Rabbit by Cella

Dildos

Sh! Whirly Girly 2 Glow by Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
Vamp Greta by Dangerous Lilly
njoy Pure Wand by buzzvibe
Vixen Creations Johnny by Sammi
LELO Ella by Missy
Vixen Creations Spur by Adriana

Anal Toys

Aneros MGX by Kate
Don Juan by Femenina Deliciosa
Tantus Dipper by Isabel0329
Deluxe Anal Douche by Femenina Deliciosa

Toys for Cocks

Hotmilk by The Bedroom Blogger

Lube, Massage Oil, Bath Stuff, & etc.

BDSM/Fetish

Adult Books/Games

Adult DVDs & Porn

Sex Furniture

Liberator BonBon by Rayne

Miscellaneous

National Day Of Slutdom; buying a costume, the Disney princess Round-up edition

2010-10-05T23:25:00.001-07:00

I bought the Baddest costume for Halloween today. There is going to be a TES (Kink) party Halloween weekend and I plan on going with my friends. I am taking advantage of the newly minted holiday formally known as Halloween now officially national slut day; to prance around in public dressed like a pedos wet dream. In thigh-high white socks and something poufy, I decided to go all out and by the cutest, slutiest costumes I could squeeeeeeeze myself into. I unfortunately didn't get the slutty costume I wanted.

I wanted to be Alice and when my dominant friend suggested I should go as Mc gee's Alice; I thought to myself Genius! Slutty, zombie, bloody, angry Alice for the win!

But alas, spending almost 70 dollars for a cheap costume I most likely will be in for less then an hour (hey it's a kink party) is a waste of money. So I set my sites on a different and less interesting Disney princess to defile:

I love this costume, and I can picture myself doing tons of unforgivable things in this costume, but I absolutely loath the character. I never liked snow white, even when I was a child I thought her story had more holes in it then a cheese grater( I mean seriously, alone asleep, with seven tiny men??). It maybe my inner riotgrrrl who detest snow-white with such passion; or it might be the oppressive plotline that drives me to feel like back handing her in the face and water boarding the prince.

( Well, that wasn't hypocritical at. All.)

Either way, I am breathing new life into this lifeless, simple-minded character this Halloween, in my finest pair of slutty Mary Janes and everything.

Happy wednesday!

Let it Snow, Let it Snow, Let it Snow

2010-09-07T08:12:00.000-07:00

I had a threesome with my friends 4 nights ago

Mid fellation The Midge Dominate thought it would be a good idea to snowball her.

She didn't know what it was, so we showed her.

She took it like a champ

Happy Tuesday!

What is the origin of your Twitter screen name?

2010-09-06T08:07:00.001-07:00

Squeaking is a noise I commonly make, whether it's during play or while watching a scary movie. I’m also a big jonny the homicidal maniac fan and his sidekick / terrified neighbor is also named squee. To my surprise there are A LOT of squeaks and squee's floating around the Internet; more then I supposed there would be. So I took it upon myself to alter the spelling a bit so I’d have the SN I wanted. :) How did you come up with your screen name?

Ask me anything

So... Music Monday

2010-08-30T15:19:00.000-07:00

So, we bought a cat, actually my niece found him at a flea market. He can't be any older then 2-3 weeks maybe. I named him Danzig (my ideal pet name), which was shot down by everyone one in my house so alas he has no name yet. Either way i'm addicted to his kitty love, speaking of things i'm addicted to, I normally post a serious of three songs I really like but this is the only one that matters right now:

Happy Monday

Don't tease me with your Gay sex!

2010-08-21T21:47:00.000-07:00

::SPOILER ALERT::

If you haven't watched true blood and or have been thinking about tuning in to the show, my ranty post may kill it for you.

You know what pisses me off, the fact that these " progressive" TV shows have gay characters but only allow semi sexual scenes between them. I’ve been watching true blood sense the beginning and now that Lafayette has a love interest I was excited over the prospect of gay sex depicted on the show. In the episode Night of the Sun, Lafayette Finally gets it on with Jesus and oh! How convenient, instead they cut to something else followed by Sookie and bill buck naked, fucking the sweet lord out of one another. Granted, it's better then the Asexual and awesomely flamboyant couple on modern family but you can't tease your queer viewership with the prospect of gay sex and then copout! Not cool guys, not cool.

Does anyone else feel like this?

RRPDST(rape related posttraumatic stress)

2010-08-11T22:39:00.000-07:00

I'm writing this while coming out of a(n) episode. I had a bad flashback while listening to my headphones. I was standing in my living room minding my own business and before I realized it I was crying and hyperventilating on the floor. Everything is too bright and too loud right now, but I really wanted to post a little information for anyone else who's going through what I am right now.

Overview

Traumatic events such as rape cause both short-term and long-term stress reactions. Many people who experience long-term stress reactions continue to function at optimal levels. Those who are unable to function at a normal range or have difficulties in one or more areas may have Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). This bulletin discusses Rape-related Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (RR-PTSD), a form of PTSD suffered by sexual assault and rape victims. For more information on PTSD, please refer to the bulletin "Posttraumatic Stress Disorder."

The four major symptoms of Rape-related Posttraumatic Stress Disorder are:

Re-experiencing the trauma

Rape victims may experience uncontrollable intrusive thoughts about the rape, essentially unable to stop remembering the incident. Many rape victims have realistic nightmares and dreams about the actual rape. In addition, victims may relive the event through flashbacks, during which victims experience the traumatic event as if it was happening now. Additionally, victims are distressed by any event that symbolizes the trauma of rape. Victims avoid talking about the event and will avoid any stimuli or situations which remind them of the rape.

Social withdrawal

The second major RR-PTSD symptom for rape survivors is social withdrawal. It has been described as psychic numbing, denial and a feeling of being emotionally dead. They do not experience feelings of any kind. One way it shows up in the lives of survivors is a diminished interest in living. It is not that they are suicidal, but they have no interest in their children, in their jobs, and what feelings they do experience have a very narrow range. Victims experiencing RR-PTSD may not feel joy, pain, or really much of anything; many experience a kind of amnesia. In addition, victims with RR-PTSD may not remember the details of what happened to them.

Avoidance behaviors and actions

The third set of symptoms of RR-PTSD are avoidance behaviors and actions. Victims may experience a general tendency to avoid any thoughts, feelings, or cues which could bring up the catastrophic and most traumatizing elements of the rape. This may be characterized by refusing to drive near the spot where the rape occurred.

Increased physiological arousal characteristics

There may be an exaggerated startle response -- hyper-alertness and hyper-vigilance -- which requires that the victim pay attention to every sound and sight in their environment. Many experience sleep disorders which result in poor sleep patterns for chronic RR-PTSD victims, such as trouble falling or staying asleep. In addition, memory may be impaired, and many victims have difficulties concentrating, which affects tasks that must be completed in their daily lives. Victims may exhibit a kind of irritability, hostility, rage and anger that produce further isolation.

Some disturbing new research indicates that certain physiological changes in the brain may be permanent conditions. Some survivors with RR-PTSD are unable to accurately gauge the passage of time. Consequently, they are likely to show up for appointments late, early, or not at all. Another possible permanent side effect is a kind of tunnel vision. Victims may be unable to see the "big picture" which results in difficulty distinguishing between a little crisis and a big crisis. Therefore, all events in their lives are viewed as crises.

In Rape in America: A Report to the Nation, a widely-cited study by the National Center for Victims of Crime and the Crime Victims Research and Treatment Center, 13 percent of American women surveyed had been raped and 31 percent of theses rape victims developed RR-PTSD. The study showed that with 683,000 women raped each year in this country, approximately 211,000 will develop RR-PTSD each year. In their attempts to cope with RR-PTSD symptoms, many victims may develop major depression. Rape victims are three times more likely than non-victims of crime to have a major depression episode. Rape victims are 4.1 times more likely than non-crime victims to contemplate suicide. In fact, 13 percent of all rape victims actually attempt suicide, which confirms the devastating and potentially life threatening mental health impact of rape.

In attempting to cope with the above symptoms, drug and alcohol consumption are likely to be companions in the victim's attempt to gain relief from these symptoms. RIA found that, compared to non-victims of crime, rape victims are:

13.4 times more likely to have two or more major alcohol problems; and
Twenty-six times more likely to have two or more major serious drug abuse problems.

With a growing body of knowledge about RR-PTSD, help is available through most rape crisis and trauma centers. Support groups have been established where survivors can meet regularly to share experiences to help relieve the symptoms of RR-PTSD. For some survivors, medication prescribed along with therapy is the best combination to relieve the pain. Just as in the treatment of any other illness, at the first opportunity, the individual should be encouraged to talk about the traumatic experience. This ventilating provides a chance to receive needed support and comforting as well as an opportunity to begin to make sense of the experience (Allen). "To diminish symptoms of PTSD, you must work on two fronts- coming to terms with the past and alleviating stress in the present (Allen)." In addition, violence-related trauma affects not only direct victims, but those who care deeply about them.

Bibliography

Allen, Jon. (1995). Coping with Trauma: A Guide to Self-Understanding. Washington, DC: American Psychiatric Press.
Figley, Charles R. (1992). "Post-traumatic Stress Disorder, Part 1." Violence Update, 2(7): 1, p.8-9.
Harvey, Mary & Judith Herman. (1992). "The Trauma of Sexual Victimization: Feminist Contributions to Theory, Research, and Practice." PTSD Research Quarterly, 3(3): 1-3.

For additional information, please contact:

National Crime Victims Research and Treatment Center
Department of Psychiatry & Behavioral Sciences
Medical University of South Carolina
165 Cannon Street, MSC852
Charleston, SC 29425-0742
Administrative Phone: (843) 792-2945
Clinic Phone: (843) 792-8209
Center for Women's Policy Studies
1776 Massachusetts Avenue, NW, #450
Washington, D.C. 20036
Phone: (202) 872-1770
Website: http://www.centerwomenpolicy.org/

RAINN
Rape Abuse & Incest National Network
24 Hour hotline: 1-800-656-HOPE
E-mail: info@rainn.org
Website: http://www.rainn.org/

All rights reserved.
Copyright © 2009 by the National Center for Victims of Crime. This information may be freely distributed, provided that it is distributed free of charge, in its entirety and includes this copyright notice.

Cited from: the natiional center for victims of crime

National Center for Victims of Crime & Crime Victims Research and Treatment Center. (1992). Rape in American: A Report to the Nation. Arlington, VA: National Center for Victims of Crime.

Ringel, Cheryl. (1997). Criminal Victimization...Washington, DC: Bureau of Justice Statistics, US Department of Justice.

Say Buh Bye

2010-08-02T20:00:00.000-07:00

Spending my summer nights smoking and masturbating, avoiding the problems of my shit year. Losing my boyfriend and discovering my position amongst close friends as nothing special has made my time at home .. interesting to say the least. I’ve spent my days working my ass off for a few dollars I quickly spend on over due bills but the fleeting feeling of autonomy is worth the empty pockets. I don't feel much like writing because I know nothing I have to say is positive. Slowly I'm learning to let things go, but in due time right? I'll be lurking this place, when I have something spectacular to say I'll be back, in the mean time

Happy Monday

Not Bad Eh?

2010-07-09T00:35:00.000-07:00

Last night was the first time I went to sleep before the sun rose. I’ve done quite a bit of moving around sense my San Francisco departure 30 days ago. I got lost in Minneapolis where I met a very angry flight attendant who directed me to the wrong gate. I met a pushy cab driver that asked for a tip before I reached my destination. I made psychedelic cupcakes for my birthday dinner (pschycodelic in color not in substance) and now that I’m single I’ve met and declined an array of Tops and Dominates. This is the part of dating I hate, the getting to know you process. Where for the most part I feel like I have to carry the conversation or common curtsy gets lost in the midst of everything. I’ve spoken to a few new players, none of which have really peaked my interest. Most of them are older and some are so unappealing; saying that makes me feel shallow? Looks aren't the deal breaker for me but as of recently my standards have risen to impossible heights.

Or maybe I'm done settling?

Either way I was feeling down today, from the time I woke up this morning. I think it has a little to do with my unpleasant doctors appointment the day before, now that I’m in a state that takes my insurance I’m reminded that I need a Colposcopy after an abnormal pap smear maybe, fuck, a year ago? Now that I’m a newly minted adult I had to change physicians. I have this unsettling feeling that my doctor doesn't like me. After sitting down and catching up with her on my medical history and my bad habits I had to stand for a weigh in. I watched as the nurse jumbled with the lower bar, confused as to where exactly she should set it. 150, 200, 250. I saved her the trouble of insulting me " 250 is where it should be" she didn't look at me instead she followed my directions, making her job a lot easier. "252, write that down” from one nurse to another like I wasn't in the room. I stepped down and waited. In trots this short red headed woman who wasted no time; do you do drugs? How many sexual partners do you have? Men or women; Yes, a few, both? She gave me referrals so I finally have the chance to see a therapist. I'm actually relieved? I thought after years of reluctancy I would put up more of a fight?

Before I had the chance to unpack, I started receiving a flood of phone calls, my friends are funny that way; I hear from them 5-6 times a year until word gets out I may be coming home and overnight I’m a Beatle. I went to my first play a party of the summer, Epic picked me up somewhere on 34th street and we walked there. Stupidly I wore high heels and I don't know why, I always end up naked and barefoot so clothing and footwear is optional. After hobbling down 7th and 8 ave me, Epic and his friend finally made it there. It was like a scene from that Stanley Kubrick movie. Everything was dark red and embroidered; people stood around aimlessly sipping punch while others where spread eagle on the carpets and mattresses, fucking and punching one another. There was a squealing woman in the fetal position on the floor with her mega Dom standing above her enjoying her wishy-washy movements. There were a few noobs and more faces I supposed I wouldn’t recognize and surprisingly did.

What I love most about Epic and his posse of kinky peeps is; they are always ready to go, the only guy with a suitcase full of kink toys and tennis racket bags full of whips and canes always at the ready; I’m never disappointed. I had a good time, and we had a few really great flogging, and spanking scenes together. I'm vowing to spend as much time getting my ass kicked this summer then I have in the past. In my first few weeks I’ve done staples, fire play (which I’m really excited to talk about) and I’ve played with my frenemy the pure wand.

Not bad for a birthday weekend...

FILLER!

2010-06-15T11:31:00.000-07:00

All right I haven't been around for a few days, solely because I have a tumblr adiction and until I can admit I have problem there will be no resolution. I spent a few minutes sifting through my archives and everything has been so sad here followed by a barrage of pleasurists post (I don't like that at all) I've been writing and thinking and writing so hopefully soon I’ll have a few things to say until then...

you know what isn't sad and depressing ... donnavon

you know what else isn't sad and depressing Kittens!

you know what else isn't sad and depressing, illegal substances

Things I love to watch blitzed that aren't sad and depressing

girls kissing.. also not sad and depressing

HAPPY TUESDAY!

The Y Project

2010-06-06T10:23:00.000-07:00

I found these photos recently by artist Petter Hegre, artist and photographer who's created really fantastic erotic images. Currently he's working on a set called the Y project. A sequence of 20 photographs taken of various models (muse’s) vaginas. It’s very simple and graphic in a sense; Its photograph evidence of a common consensus. “We aren’t all the same. “ Here is an Except from the exhibition:

"No two creatures are created equal. We are, each one of us, as different as two sunsets, as unique us our fingerprints. So it is with the female sex flower. It is as diverse as our very existence. It is life's most vital organ."

"The Y Project, we have taken Heidegger's musings, drawn back the multiple layers of suppression and inhibition and shown that, in the candid eye of the microscope, humanity's point of entry possesses an individuality that is surely truth itself."

you can see the Y project here*

The Break

2010-06-01T02:27:00.000-07:00

"Love lasts long enough to change you but never long enough to please you"

-fairiesarereal

It’s starting.

The fits of no sleep, I hate the summer. I want to have a good time and I’ve done everything in my power over the last few days to make sure that I stay busy but there is something preventing this. It’s funny because I didn't meet the guy who raped me until sometime in July and yet here I am wide awake, exhausted and daunted in June.

My reality has been tossed; I broke up with Misant four days ago. We had a fight about him using my piercing in his portfolio, piercing he didn't do. I told him no and for the last time I watched as he flipped a conniption in Google chat. I just about had enough. No more tears no more stress and like that I was done. 365 plus days of this relationship I decided to end because of this? But you know it wasn’t just that, no it's a plethora of things. It’s feeling bad over issues I can't control. It loves someone you don't believe knows the meaning of the word. It’s a lot of things, stirring inside of me for what seems like forever now. I told myself I was waiting, it's a bad time right now but time will pass and everything will get better. It always does. It’s the same kind of optimism that kills people. You’re so optimistic that everything will get better with time you become dismissive toward the fact that; in life there isn't always a happy ending.

It’s been four days and I cry in fits. While frying eggs or walking to the store I’ll stop and think about something good. A flash of Mis and I happy and content, I cry like he was the one who broke up with me but it's worse. He wasn't fazed. I called and hung up and then I called again trying to build up the courage to tell him I couldn't do it. Before I found an iota of bravery in myself he had already beat me to the punch. He knew before I parted my lips what I was trying to say.

No I don't want to be with you anymore.

Yes, I still love you very much.

Please don't go away.

I didn't have to say a thing. He wasn't surprised or upset all I felt was static. What had seemed like a lifetime for me was another bad choice for him a relationship came and went; one good pussy, sad to see you go? That's how I felt just another face, another failure. I think I’ve wept these past few days with remorse for my bruised ego. For some people it's really easy you find a girl, you fuck her. Tell her you love her, try to make her happy; it doesn't work. Tell her you're sorry, discard and repeat. This was my first long term relationship sense that summer, so in a sense this whole experience holds great sentimental value. I'm still properly functioning, all of my bits work. I can still love and feel pain or I’ve loved and felt pain. Not long after a void arose. Like Emotional lypo, all of my feelings were sucked out leaving my innards hollow. And now that's how I feel, just hollow. I needed a drink or a cigarette but instead I got something better. An aim message; it was Epic with perfect timing pre usual. He asked how I was and whether or not “the boy” and I were doing okay. Conveniently no but I’d decided to sit on it for a while. A few days back and forth with we chatted like I’d never left New York. like nothing had changed. He asked if I wanted to go to the floating world, which is the BDSM equivalent to lollapalooza. And I didn’t decline. There has been talk of the midget and where she'll be. The first girl I’ve ever slept with and the probability of us sleeping together again grows and it grows. On one hand I told myself I wasn't ready the thought of having sex right now is repulsive. I’ve been dealing with difficult PDST symptoms. Randomly twitching and flinching, I shake and my night terrors are vivid (actually they're more like all day terrors I don't have to be sleeping to have one). But none of that's ever stopped me before.

My bags are packed and I leave for New York Wednesday morning. I'm always nervous about going back but I tend to forget I was born there; the platform of my soul is there. My friends my demons all of it is in New York and it's only proper I spend my twenty-second birthday there. Its kismet; I find a cheap plane ticket last minute flying in on my birthday. So now I have to go. It's strange how these things happen. Change, it just happens to you and I desperately need it. I don't know if this change is good. In many ways I feel like I’m taking a few steps backward on path that's accelerating forward. But I need a new environment with a sense of familiarity. I won't find that anywhere else.

How appropriate is it my endings & beginnings start in the summer? I think the intellectuals call this poetic justice.

Fill In Friday

2010-05-27T15:11:00.000-07:00

1. Anything Grilled is the best food to take on a picnic.

 2. Summer is coming and I’m trying my hardest to make it my mine again.

 3. I have a hole in my favorite pair of flip-flops

 4. To love someone is stressful yet worth it.

 5. I don't want to go on a long hike.

 6. When I crave food, it's usually kielbasa or sushi.

 7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to getting in a little prototype play, tomorrow my plans include, cleaning my apartment and Sunday, I want to sleep in and finish season 6 of the L word!

What I've done with myself Lately

2010-05-27T15:00:00.000-07:00

- Finally finished the semester (with a higher GPA then the last woo!)

- Started taking this going pescetarian thing seriously.

-Played the shit out of prototype 3 days in row.

-Tuned in to watch Joe Rogan talk about how amazing masturbation with a fleshlight is.

- Made super green cupcakes

with super green Cream cheese frosting

- Discovered the wonders of mint chocolate chip ice-cream.

- Created an Ok cupid to take their quizzes.

-Declared myself presently inactive on fetlife

-Broke up Misant (I’m not ready to talk about it)

-Became increasingly addicted to tumblr

-Received a Pm from epic about floating world (I’m not sure if I’m going yet).

-I might get my summer Job back!

-Watched a bottle of Pierre blow up in my freezer

- Opened up to friends about my rape post has no title, only to find out that I am not the only one.

-Ambivalent about reviewing for this blog.

- In the process of buying a ticket back to New York

Hopefully I'll have something of substance to say soon, in the mean time.

Listen to this

Watch this

Smile please!

Happy Thursday

What It Feels Like.

2010-05-19T20:57:00.000-07:00

"Write it! Do it! And then I want you to walk out that door, and I want you to walk down the street, and anybody that wants to fuck you, say, "Sure, sure, no problem." And when they do, you have to say, "Thank you very, very much," and make sure that you have a smile on your face, and then, you stupid fucking coward, you're going to know what it feels like to be a woman!"

-Jenny The L Word

Pleasurists #77

2010-05-18T10:24:00.001-07:00

More Robin by carvenaked
Welcome to Pleasurists, a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days. For updates and information follow our RSS Feed and Twitter.
Did you miss Pleasurists #76? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #78? Be sure to read our submission guidelines and then use our submission form and submit it before Sunday May 16th at 11:59pm PDT.
Want to win some swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.

Win Your Very Own We-Vibe! Deadline: May 13th.
Squeeze Some VixSkin! Deadline: May 13th @ 11:59pm Pacific.
Giveaway: $25 Gift Card from EdenFantasys Deadline: May 16th @ 8pm Eastern.
Aqua Rabbit Giveaway Deadline: May 16th @ 11pm Eastern.
Summer is Cumming Giftcard Giveaway Deadline: May 22nd.
$300 Shopping Spree Deadline: May 31st.
Win a Bliss 3 Mini Vibe Deadline: May 31st @ 11:59pm Eastern.
Win a Bride-to-Be Collection Deadline: May 31st @ 11:59pm Eastern.
Win A Premium Toy Set AND A Free Session With Dr. Ruthie Deadline: May 31st.
Enter to Win an Incoqnito Lambskin Collar! Deadline: May 31st @ 11am Central.
TabuToys.com Erotic Story Contest Deadline: June 1st.
Vamp Giveaway Deadline: June 1st.

Looking for sexy posts other than reviews?

e[lust] #13
Editor

Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
On to the reviews…
Vibrators

Ophoria Beyond 1 by Essin’ Em
Ophoria Beyond 1 by Sommer Marsden
LELO Mia by Mistress Kay
I Rub My Duckie Pirate and Video Review by Sammi
Onye Fleur by Mistress Kay
G-Ki by True Pleasures
G-Swirl by namelesschaos
Close2you Harmonia by Tonia
Fun Factory Ellove by Kaijah
Fun Factory Ellove by Marilyn
Dinky Digger II by Mistress Kay
Couture Collection Inspire by namelesschaos
Fairy Wand by Britni TheVadgeWig
The Cone by Saraid
Babelight by Sammi
Babelight by Sea of Neptune
Babelight by Nanny
Babelight by Pretty Power Tools
LELO Mona by Carrie Ann
Nubby G by Alan & Michele
Rock Chick by Garnet Joyce
Rock Chick by Carrie Ann
Perfect Pet by Jessie Beth
Perfect Pet by Red Vinyl Kitty
Vida Vanta by Carrie Ann
Mystic Wand by Dr. Ruthie
Tulip Wand by Sammi
Vibrator Upgrade Kit by Pretty Power Tools
OhMiBod Club Vibe by Jonsbabydoll
OhMiBod Club Vibe by Jess Manifesto
We-Vibe II by Toy With Me
Radio Love by Joanna Cake
Fun Factory Paul & Paulina by Pretty Power Tools

Dildos

Tantus Vamp by Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
Vixen Maverick by Epiphora
Njoy Eleven by Sammi
Nobessence Intrigue by Carrie Ann
Hardwood Dildos #507 by Toys in Love
Vixen Creations Mistress by Wilhelmina Wang
Athena by Tuesday
Feeldoe by Carrie Ann
Sedeux Glam by JonsBabydoll
Wall Banger by Mystress Lady Evyl
Rose Gspotter by Jonsbabydoll
Tantus Compact by Missy
Rascal Toys Brandon Lee by Pretty Power Tools

Anal Toys

Lube, Massage Oil, Bath Stuff, & etc.

BDSM/Fetish

Adult Books/Games

Adult Movies & Porn

Storage

Lingerie

Miscellaneous

Quagmires Transgender Reality Check

2010-05-10T11:48:00.000-07:00

I was watching hulu this morning, indulging in my regularly scheduled procrastination when I decided to watch the most recent episode of family guy. I stopped watching family guy and other shows created by Seth McFarlane for a while. I don’t always agree with the way he chooses to discuss the topics on his shows. I always walked a way feeling like I should be thinking about the episode I just watched. Instead I walk away pissed off and aggravated. Any who! This morning it seemed like a great idea! It started off decently enough some bits were politically incorrect and some bits were funny and poignant. After all this is the episode where quagmire the notorious womanizing pervert learns that his war hero father is actually a pre-op transgender woman. Long story short, quagmire’s father changes her name and has the surgery etc, etc. Granted I know this is just a cartoons and I shouldn't read so much in to something so trivial but without giving away too much. One of the characters overreacts to sleeping with her after the surgery. I thought the last few minutes of the episode sent a mixed message about what it must feel like to be transgender and single. I took it upon myself to do some research and set off a bomb in the hulu forum but before I could write a decently educated essay on why I disliked the episode I came across this comment.

" Hey there hulu.I'm a transsexual woman and I have mixed feelings about this episode. I feel like they communicated both sides of the issue pretty clearly and i'm glad both were present.
I think though, that it's important to note that transsexuals have a lot of options as far as relationships and dating and such. Transsexualism is a lot more hetero-normative than homosexuality. In a lot of cultures, including this one, men would sooner sleep with a transsexual than a gay man. It;s important to note that both are extremely different from one another and that your actual attraction to a gender has nothing to do with that person's genitalia but generally a list of several other things that make them attractive. I've been in a lot of situations like Ida where a man picks up on me and he doesn't know. NOw you'd think that when i told them they'd be disgusted like Brian was, but in more cases than not, they are intrigued, turned on and very open to it.

I find that there are a LOT more men interested in transsexuals than we are lead to believe. Programs like this would try to communicate that transsexuals are this sort of strange creature that is unaccepted and lives in this grey area of life. Reality is that in most cases, we do just fine. Though we do not have the visibility of gay men, we are more accepted and sooner embraced.

You can openly deny this but reality is that at the end of the day, i have a crap load of men asking me out on dates.

Thought it was a good episode despite. Over simplifies transition and SRS, but that makes sense with the format of the show"

Well, so much for me having anything to say. Someone already has and a lot better then I would have.

Alright! SO I cracked.

2010-05-08T20:01:00.000-07:00

Light does not stay. The tender things are those we fold away. Coarse fabrics are the ones for common wear. In silence I have watched you comb your hair. Intimate the silence, dim and warm. I could but did not, reach to touch your arm. I could, but do not, break that which is still. (Almost the faintest whisper would be shrill.) So moments pass as though they wished to stay. We have not long to love. A night. A day

-Tennessee Williams
So I have tumbler now.

SQWEAK

My Rape Post Has No Title

2010-05-05T00:12:00.000-07:00

photo source : little pretty

Alice Sebold is an author I never paid much attention to, after finishing the lovely bones [movie] tonight I went searching for other things she’s written when I ran across lucky: A memoir the first novel penned by her. It’s about her assault & rape. I haven’t read it, and as much as I’m interested in learning more about rape and rape culture, I can't make myself do it. I can't make myself sit down long enough to write my own rape story. I spent the month of April reading entries by other bloggers about their assaults hoping that I would be empowered by them, but instead I’m sad for those who've had to go through that and just as ambivalent about writing my own story. At first I thought I needed to talk about it. I needed to write it out because somehow that would rid me of my anxiety and the dense and constant flashbacks I have. Suddenly it would just stop. Deep down I know it’s not going to make these things better but nothing has stopped me from trying. I know that these next few months are going to be hard for me. Misant is going through some serious legal problems and June through August are just black months for me. The summer isn’t a happy time anymore. I relive that one-day everyday with such intensity. During the summer months I deflect and can't differentiate the real world from what's going on in my head. So I drink and drink and work and drink and stew and work and drink, because I don’t have the ability to do anything else.

Occasionally I talk about psychotropics and I wrote a trip report a few months back. If there was one thing that helped me cope with my rape it would be LSD. Sitting down for 16 hours watching my rape play out like a movie doesn’t sound cathartic but trying to explain that whole experience in words will do it no justice I think. I feel as though I’m looking for justification now, for someone else to realize this fucked up situation i'm in. I want someone to tell me it's okay to be completely lost. I want another way to deal with this Trauma I’m carrying around and I want to think that writing is going to help.

But on the other hand I want revenge. Because I’m spiteful and when I’m wronged it embeds itself in my psyche and I will never let that person live it down( I know, It's one of my best personality traits). I never got that chance to shame him. Knowing everyday that that motherfucker is walking around lying, stealing, and hurting other people. Possibly living a pleasant life, smiling and laughing with no recollection of who I am? That thought boils the blood under my skin.

I want him to know that he isn't as smart as he thinks he is.

I want the three people who watched, entertained to carry around the agony I do.

I want them to know that I was Sober and scared.

I want them to know that that song haunts me and when I hear it I run screaming.

That smell

The lowered gates

The yellow lights

That fucking bench; all of it

I Remember.

If I Had A Tumblr...

2010-04-28T22:57:00.000-07:00

If I had a tumblr it would be pretty and random. But I don't because I have a vi.sualize.us ( which is the source of all of these images). I love it ^_^ but I feel a little late in internet image collecting community.

Belated Boobquake photos

2010-04-27T22:12:00.000-07:00

I was so excited for boobquake, so excited in fact that I totally forgot! And didn't post anything :( and it was Monday maybe a music Monday! I’m so off my game, any who here is my boobie cleavage, I think I can start an earthquake...

I took them with my computer. My camera isn't working so, they aren't of the best quality :(

I think these two are my favorites.

Hey look there is a hole in my shirt...

my boobies look strange in this bra? Okay enough with the commentary!

I take it back these are my favorite.

And there you have it, my plate shifting cleavage.

Ah and the videos below are so epic that I’m only posting two instead of my usual three. It’s that serious. Please go check out julianSmith, he's so funny it hurts.

HAPPY TUESDAY everybody ^_^

the second Video was acting up so here is the link

pleasurists #75

2010-04-27T20:56:00.000-07:00

>

A Captive Fairy by HobbleSkirt
Welcome to Pleasurists, a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days. For updates and information follow our RSS Feed and Twitter.
Did you miss Pleasurists #74? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #76? Be sure to read our submission guidelines and then use our submission form and submit it before Sunday May 2nd at 11:59pm PDT.
Want to win some swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.
>

$200 Shopping Spree Giveaway Deadline: April 30th @ 11:59pm.
Jollies Dildo Giveaway Deadline: April 30th @ Noon Eastern.
Contest: Sexy Scavenger Hunt! Deadline: April 30th @ 10pm Eastern.
Tell Me Your Best Undercover Kinkster Moment Deadline: April 30th @ 11:59pm Central.
Ophoria April Sweepstakes Beyond 1 Deadline: April 30th @ Midnight Eastern.
Lover’s Choice April Sweepstakes Horny Hot & Wild Dice Deadline: April 30th @ Midnight Eastern.
Luxotiq Isis Giveaway! Deadline: May 2nd.
Mother’s Day Giveaway Deadline: May 3rd @ Noon Eastern.
Facebook Friends Contest Deadline: May 3rd.
Calling All Hot Mamas! Deadline: May 3rd @ 11am Central.
Eden Fantasys Gift Card Giveaway Deadline: May 6th.
OhMiMother’s Day Giveaway Deadline: May 9th.

Looking for sexy posts other than reviews?

e[lust] #11
Editor’s Pick

Free-Hardcore.com by SapioSlut

With a name like that, you’d think that www.free-hardcore.com would be one of those dreadful porn aggregators, showing nothing more than row upon row of vacant-eyed, silicone-titted ‘teens’ engaged in the most banal of sexual acts. But it’s not.

Note: A wonderful review of kink.com’s free content site, for those of us who love kink.com but don’t have a subscription. Maybe you already knew about this, but I, for one, was in the dark, and thought everyone should know. Not to mention I adore the beginning of the review.

Editor

Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
On to the reviews…
Vibrators

Dildos

Tantus Vamp by Mistress Kay
Tantus Curve by HotMoviesForHer Sex Toy Crew
Mr. Softee by Tuesday
Sedeux Glam by JonsBabydoll
Fun Factory Curve by Sophie
Tantus G-Force by Juliettia
Rose G-Spotter by Faete Grant
Xtra Sweet Double Dong by Missy

Anal Toys

Close2you Rhapsodia Beads by Cooper

Toys for Cocks

Lube, Massage Oil, Bath Stuff, & etc.

BDSM/Fetish

Silky Sensual Handcuffs by Sundae

Adult Books/Games

Adult Movies & Porn

Lingerie

Fingerless Ruffle Gloves by Juliettia

Miscellaneous

Pleasurists

2010-04-25T12:34:00.000-07:00

Bowl of Temptation by Raven Girl Photography
Welcome to Pleasurists, a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days. For updates and information follow our RSS Feed and Twitter.
Did you miss Pleasurists #73? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #75? Be sure to read our submission guidelines and then use our submission form and submit it before Sunday April 25th at 11:59pm PDT.
Want to win some swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.

Zestra Giveaway Deadline: April 21st.
Celebrate Earth Day: LELO Gigi Contest Deadline: April 22nd.
Contest! Deadline: April 24th @ 11:59pm.
I Dare You… Giveaway! Deadline: April 25th.
Click N Charge Deadline: April 25th.
Jollies Dildo Giveaway Deadline: April 30th @ Noon Eastern.
Contest: Sexy Scavenger Hunt! Deadline: April 30th @ 10pm Eastern.
Tell Me Your Best Undercover Kinkster Moment Deadline: April 30th @ 11:59pm Central.
Ophoria April Sweepstakes Beyond 1 Deadline: April 30th @ Midnight Eastern.
Lover’s Choice April Sweepstakes Horny Hot & Wild Dice Deadline: April 30th @ Midnight Eastern.
Facebook Friends Contest Deadline: May 3rd.
Calling All Hot Mamas! Deadline: May 3rd @ 11am Central.

Looking for sexy posts other than reviews?

e[lust] #11
Editor’s Pick

Awkward Mother’s Day: A Dual Review of Form 2 by Carnivalesq

If you all remember, Mom helped out with a brief comment about LELO’s Liv. The reason I wanted her in on the Form 2 review is… well, there are so many reasons. One? It’s catchy. A dual review of the Form 2, which is itself a dual-motor vibrator? It’s got a nice ring to it. Also, Mother’s Day is coming up (HINT!). But the real reason? I know there are a number of readers who are older than I am, who are probably closer to my Mom’s age.

Note: If the fact that it’s a dual-review done by Carnivalesq and her mother doesn’t already want you to read it (though I don’t know why you would need more incentive than that), they also comment on some “gems from the user manual” and lots of links to amusing videos littered through the text.

Editor

Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
On to the reviews…
Vibrators

Lucid Dreams #54 by Jessie Beth
OhMiBod Club Vibe by Mistress Kay
Onye Fleur by Darling Dove
Onye B2 Fleur by Jessie Beth
Jimmyjane Form 2 by Carnivalesq
Ice Vibrator by Jessie Beth
Close2you Sinfonia by Marilyn
Duo Obsessions Lavish by Mistress Kay
Sexy Bunny by Jessie Beth
Iconic Rabbit by Sammi
Sqweel by HotMoviesForHer Sex Toy Crew
Lipstick Vibe by Muffyspingulove
Ez Bend by Keeshia
Rhythm O Bounding Bunny by Syd Vicous
Laya Spot by Kaijah
Bet on Black by Sammi
Rampant Rabbit Thruster Review by Joanna Cake
Close2you Opus by Marilyn
LELO Gigi by Pretty Power Tools
One Touch Magic Bullet by Sammi
Blueberry Buzz by Lux Zakari
G-Swirl by Sexorcism
G-Swirl by Missy
Venus Penis “G” by PandaDementia
OhMiBod Club Vibe by Kylie
OhMiBod Freestyle by Marilyn

Dildos

Vixen Creations Mistress by Darling Dove

Anal Toys

Nexus GPlay Trio by Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
Dichroic Glass Anal Plug by Mistress Kay
Aneros Helix by Colby H.

Toys for Cocks

Lube, Massage Oil, Bath Stuff, & etc.

Sliquid Organics Silk by Jessie Beth
Emerita Oh by True Pleasures
Gun Oil by Chops McGruff
Babeland Body Massage Candle by Sexorcism
Swede Aqua Comfort by Toys in Love
Zestra by Nanny Berry

BDSM/Fetish

Adult Books/Games

Adult Movies & Porn

Lingerie

Bra and Cincher 3 Piece Set by Isabel0329

Miscellaneous

Blogger Fucks Me In The Ass

2010-04-24T21:33:00.001-07:00

And loses my template.

EDIT:

Okay, my skin is fixed. Back to our regularly scheduled kinkiness.

Cum Catalog

2010-04-22T23:39:00.000-07:00

I used to write them for my Ex all the time, so when Misant asked me to cum and catalog it for him tonight, it felt like breathing fresh air. It was simple and yet everything I’ve wanted to hear. I like that he took control, gave me a deadline and instructions as to what he wanted. I felt like a little toy solider, a pet, submissive. Everything I’ve been missing so badly. I was so incredibly turned on by him, after squirting I realized I missed my mark! Surpassed the towel, which begged me to ask: what in the hell was the point in me putting the towel down when I’ve got such awful aim! Any who,

My List:

Show details 10:58 PM (13 minutes ago)

-Hung up 10:28

- Plugged in the wand

-Manually masturbated, using my fingers, to stimulate my Gspot until 10:30

- I had my first orgasm

- Used the wand until 10:38

- I came 6 times

- Squirted all six times

- Took photos

- Constructed this email

Images attached :)

Nite Nite <3

Simple and to the point,

May I just point out that my deadline was 11, and I waited that 1 minute and 30 seconds before hitting the send buttons. Thank you …. Thank you!

Musings On Fisting

2010-04-21T21:59:00.000-07:00

photo source

The first time the prospect of fisting was brought up; I was on my back staring up at Misant, admiring his dedication to toying with my parts. With one finger he finds the rhythm and the second fills me up; back and forth we rocked in unison. I threw my head back and closed my eyes, directions started to trickle out of me loudly; nonsensical verbiage he never calls me out on. I could feel the pressure from him moving in deeper. A third finger and a fourth.

I shot my eyes open and titled my head sideways to see his face, disappointed by the 3/4 view I was getting because my giant tit was in the way. I fell back hitting the pillow exhausted from rubber necking:

“What are you doing?”

“Shh.”

I don't have to see his face to know what it looks like; I can smell the mischief.

“M, I don't want to be fisted.”

“I’m not fisting you.”

Fisting[ Fist-ing]:

Fisting is a sexual activity that involves inserting a hand into the vagina or rectum. Once insertion is complete, the fingers either naturally clench into a fist or remain straight. In more vigorous forms of fisting, such as "punching," a fully clenched fist may be inserted and withdrawn slowly. Fisting may be performed with or without a partner.

-Wikipedia

Each time we fight over logistics. 'Three fingers and a thumb qualify as a fist' I’d mumble which he would reply with a simple okay or nothing at all. Last I saw him he was sitting on the edge of the bed,wearing nothing but his beard and blue glove. I stood in the door way puzzled, " This again" I thought. I Fight him but resistance is futile. Sense then I’ve had a number of surprise fistings, and not surprise! I’m going to this to you anyway but I’m surprised it’s happening, and instead of rebelling against it, I’ve started rolling with it. I think my biggest fear about fisting is just that. Fear. Not based on facts or prier experience. Its fear of change, fear of what happens after giving in. what’s difficult then doing it [fisting] with another person, would be doing it alone. I figured “I know my body better then anyone else, piece of cake”. But I’ve hurt myself more times alone then with someone else. I think my resistance speaks for its self. When I’m with him (for the most part) I want to do as he asks, but when I’m alone with no real pressure and no need to please, it's just an assignment and not for pleasure.

Fisty websites:
First Fisting experience.
five advanced fisting techniques

Sex Info 101: really help tips and other readings.